Beef Panties
Now that Beef Panties are on the fashion radar, thanks to another stellar episode of America’s Next Top Model, I’d like to discuss a few rules concerning the wearability of this season’s hottest trend.
Rule #1: Beef panties are daywear. For evening, choose veal panties.
Rule #2: Do not mix meats. Beef panties should never be worn with a pork blouse or lamb leggings. It is the equivalent of wearing pearls with tweed.
Rule #3: After Labor Day, full-length beef slacks are an acceptable alternative to beef panties.
Rule #4: Beef panties should only be worn to ANTM fashion shoots and NRA rallies. It is a faux pas to wear beef panties to the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show.
