Auntie Fashion

I’m the fashion world’s most-enduring muse.

Archive for June 2010

Dolce & Gabbana

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Dolce & Gabbana

Since when did Dolce & Gabbana become the voice of common sense in menswear?

For the second season in a row, I was amazed by how the design duo managed to make slight variations in tailoring seem so revolutionary.  But all it’s taken, really, is to understand that most men aren’t shaped like the fourteen-year-old Estonian girls they’re dressing for their women’s shows.

These are clothes for men — men with butts, thighs, shoulders and backs.  Yet the show didn’t come off as an homage to the “International Male” catalogue, as body-conscious menswear shows are prone to do.  It was hip and a little rough around the edges, but without being as contrived as a dude with a beard and skinny jeans that make his ass look like a potato in a sock.

It’s tough enough to look like a man when you’re dressed stylishly.  Guys don’t need designers who work against their body types.  We hear so much crap about how designers have abandoned women with curves.  The same thing happens in menswear all the time because it’s a lot easier to hang fabric on someone with no shape.  But some designers are good enough at crafting clothes that they don’t have to do that.  They can put men with bodies on the runway in clothes that were designed to fit those bodies.

You know that fashion is in trouble when I’m praising designers for actually designing clothes.

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June 20, 2010 at 3:46 pm

Posted in Random Reviews

Happy Birthday, Nicole Kidman

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Nicole Kidman

Happy birthday, Nicole Kidman.  I was just browsing through your IMDB page.  Sheesh!  Could you make a good movie once in a while?

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June 20, 2010 at 3:11 pm

Posted in Fashionably Old

This Year’s Cosby Sweater

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Jil Sander

Unlike a lot of the fashion pack, I haven’t been a big fan of Raf Simons for Jil Sander.  I don’t believe that the collections have been that special or current enough to be interesting.  But everyone else likes the guy, so I pay attention to him.

How could I not pay attention to him this season when he decided to make his point of view known in Technicolor?  His S/S 2011 show was bright, yet anything but brilliant.  At times it verged on Etro-like alienation.  If there’s one thing that the classic Italian label has taught us, it’s this: If you make the models look like peacocks, then you probably won’t sell the clothes.  Sometimes, less is more.  If anyone should understand that, it’s a minimalist like Simons.

I could see the top in the photo above being novel for about ten seconds.  When Dr. Rey decides to wear something other than a white V-neck out for dinner in Beverly Hills, he might choose this top.  But otherwise, it’s going to be a non-starter for most men.  It’s the Cosby sweater for 2011.  What’s worse was a dense floral print that reminded me of a snazzy outfit worn by a nurse who also likes nail decals and unicorn tattoos.  It was really, really, really out-of-touch with the masculinity of today’s consumer.  I know a lot of guys who would wear floral prints (they wear Ed Hardy rhinestones, so why not?), but none of them would be caught dead in this.  Belted blazers and trenches also had negative connotations.  This outfit in particular made me recall Judy Garland singing “Get Happy.”  Of course, I adore the reference, just not on a man who isn’t a drag queen.

On the bright side, the show did get me thinking — thinking about things that make me laugh.  What a way to start Milan Menswear Fashion Week!

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June 19, 2010 at 4:52 pm

Posted in Random Reviews

May 1996

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Cover: May 1996

Context: Barb Wire,” starring Pamela Anderson, premieres on May 3.  “Always Be My Baby” by Mariah Carey spends two weeks atop the Billboard Hot 100.  On May 27, Russian President Boris Yeltsin meets with rebel leaders to negotiate a cease-fire in the Chechnya War.  On May 30, the Hoover Institution releases an optimistic report that global warming will probably reduce mortality in the United States and provide Americans with valuable benefits.  Counterculture icon Timothy Leary dies on May 31.

Points of Interest: Not only is this the last issue of “FASHION” to use this title font, but this is also the first issue ever to not credit a designer or a label for the clothing worn on the cover — even if it’s just a spaghetti strap.

What Tyra Would Say: “I photographed the girls myself for this challenge.  Just to be different, I scrubbed their faces clean and shot them in sepia-tones.  What’s that, Paulina?  I’ve done that before?  Get out of here!  You’re fired!”

What Auntie Fashion Says: I like how most of the headlines have to do with wellness, and how none of them have anything to do with celebrities.

Grade: A.

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June 19, 2010 at 4:09 pm

Posted in 30 Years of FASHION

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Happy Birthday, Zoe Saldana

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Zoe Saldana

Happy birthday, Zoe Saldana.  I just read that you’ve become a spokesmodel for Avon.  Can you do me a favor?  Drop by with a new catalogue.  I’m out of soap-on-a-rope.

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June 19, 2010 at 3:15 pm

Posted in Fashionably Old

Happy Birthday, Alana de la Garza

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Alana de la Garza

Happy birthday, Alana de la Garza.  At least Garnier has one pretty spokesmodel!

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June 18, 2010 at 1:23 pm

Posted in Fashionably Old

Bring on the Menswear

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Thom Browne

The Milan menswear shows start tonight.  Hooray!

I’m looking forward to the menswear shows.  I’m sort of weary of womenswear lately.  There’s too much media of all kinds devoted to it, too many so-called experts making comments on it, and too many “Sex and the City 2” fans using tired phrases such as “shoe porn” just to make themselves sound clever.  Mediocrity called — it wants its cliché back!

Menswear hasn’t been spoiled by the embarrassment of bitches whom make up the fashion pack that follows womenswear.  For that reason, I think I’m going to spend some extra time covering the men’s shows this season.  Anyway, I’d take Guy Trebay over BryanBoy any day.

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June 17, 2010 at 4:29 pm