Auntie Fashion

I’m the fashion world’s most-enduring muse.

Posts Tagged ‘Stylista

It’s over!

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johanna

Johanna

Stylista crashed and burned last night with a finale that anyone could see coming from miles away.

Once Ashlie was eliminated, Johanna was the only legitimate contestant left in the race.  Could you imagine Megan or DyShaun winning after the edit they’ve been given?

It was all sort of dull.

On another note, I don’t want to criticize the Elle staffers who participated in the show for their physiques; it’s tough enough working for a fashion magazine already without some anonymous online critic snarking about the size of your ass.  Still, I really can’t believe how many unflattering fashion choices the cast of this show made.  I adore the sort of crazy clothes that only a stylista would wear, but the #1 rule of style is to wear things that fit and look good on you.

Maybe next season . . .

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December 18, 2008 at 3:15 pm

Why I’d Never Work for Elle

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STYLISTA

Stylista

Stylista might just be the most annoying reality show in the history of the genre.  Picture an all-star cycle of America’s Next Top Model where Naima, Tootie and Whitney make it to the final three.  That’s what Stylista is like.

After impressing me with a couple of great episodes, the show sunk to new depths last night as Megan, Johanna and DyShaun made it into the finale.  Megan is mean-spirited and two-faced, Johanna is completely out of her element, and DyShaun is the most-loathesome contestant I’ve seen on a reality show in years.

Yet DyShaun managed to hang on for another week, even after making another stupid copy error during a layout challenge.  Ousted Ashlie had made her share of mistakes, too, but Anne Slowey and Joe Zee chose to keep DyShaun around for another episode.

Now I’ve got a friend at Elle who used to be my boss at another magazine.  She’s smart, funny and a lovely girl who was a pleasure to work with.  I can’t imagine that the working environment at the magazine is anything like the crap I’m seeing on this show.  Anne Slowey and Joe Zee just aren’t that stupid.

I suppose that there was a producer in the background telling them what to do.  Unfortunately, neither of them realized how idiotic they were going to look with such an insipid final three standing in front of them.  But, in the event that they are being depicted in a realistic manner, I’ve decided that I won’t be pursuing any freelance opportunities at the magazine should they arise.

I might be a lot of things, but a sucker for punishment isn’t one of them — except when I’m watching this show, that is.

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December 11, 2008 at 4:32 am

Finally!

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STYLISTA

Kate and Ashlie

After a few so-so episodes, Stylista turned out another top-notch installment last night.

I really haven’t been terribly invested in the show since its second outing when Ashlie took on Megan.  Ashlie’s heroics seemed to take a back seat to the group’s mass-exclusion of Kate.  Finding herself paired with Kate in a styling challenge, Ashlie showed remarkable maturity, kindness and a competitive spirit that should take her all the way to the top.

However, the star of this episode was Kate.  After being given the boot for opening her mouth before the judging panel, Kate opened her mouth one last time to let the judges know exactly what she thought of her fellow competitors.  It was really one of the greatest moments I’ve seen on a reality show in a long time.

I remember seeing an episode of The Bachelor where Jenny Adams (who can now be seen on HelpTV) went off on the aforementioned bachelor.  The guy needed to hear what Jenny had to say, and Jenny needed to get it off her chest.  It was no time for a person with an modicum of self-respect to retreat with her tail between her legs.

Kate left Stylista on a similar note, giving Anne Slowey and Joe Zee a frank and accurate assessment of her fellow competitors.  I was standing up and clapping while it happened.

The girl may have been annoying, but she just earned herself a special place in my heart.

Oh, and maybe the contestants need to do more testimonials in front of gigantic posters of Tyra’s former Elle covers.  I barely even noticed them.

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December 4, 2008 at 4:30 am

Taste My Greatness

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STYLISTA

Stylista

Last night’s episode of Stylista was a clip show, so I don’t really have that much to say about it.  I never did get around to blogging about last week’s show, but I don’t have much to say about that either.  Instead, I’m going to tell you about a great idea I had.

Since Stylista isn’t exactly living up to its potential, and Fashion File Host Hunt was such a dud, I think it’s time that Canadian TV produced a watchable alternative to these shows.  Of course, it would have to feature me if millions of viewers are expected to tune in every week.  Aware of my undeniable popularity across all demographics, I’ve come up with the concept for my first foray into reality television.

Auntie Fashion: Taste My Greatness will chronicle the journey of a dozen so-called fashionista as they attempt to become my protege.  Yes, I already have a protege, but that’s beside the point.  This title is essentially ceremonial, like “Governor General of Canada” or “America’s Next Top Model.”

I’ve already created a short-list of contestants.  Please let me know if I’ve forgotten anyone:

Ceri Marsh; Lisa Tant; Rita Silvan; Jeanne Beker; Andrew Sardone; Glen Baxter; Jennifer Campbell; Leah Rumack; Sarah Casselman; Nathalie Atkinson; Carolyn Rohaly; Louisa McCormack.

Stay tuned for more details.

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November 27, 2008 at 3:21 pm

Out to Lunch

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While I should be sitting here posting my updates on the outcome of last night’s finale of America’s Next Top Model and the latest episode of Stylista, I had to record both shows.  I’ll get around to watching them later today.  Until then, I’m going to avoid all media so that the result isn’t spoiled. 

I guess that means I won’t be able to watch Regis and Kelly this morning.  Oh, the horror!

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November 20, 2008 at 3:14 pm

How to Get the Bitch Edit

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STYLISTA

Megan

Meet Megan from the CW’s Stylista.  At first I didn’t like her very much because she’s a real bitch.  Now I’m starting to warm up to her because she’s a real bitch.

A couple of weeks ago, Ashlie saw right through Megan and went on the defensive.  I was very excited because I thought that an epic battle was about to take place between the young women.  It’s always fun when reality shows cast people who watch reality shows, and it was as if both of these contestants knew exactly where to lead the cameras to ensure that I would be fed a constant diet of trash.

I was hungry for more!  Then Ashlie cracked during the next episode.  She obviously wasn’t as savvy as I believed she was, but Megan kept up her end of the bargain.

In last night’s episode, Megan made a glaringly obvious about-face to cover her tracks in front of guest judge Tory Burch.  I laughed out loud when she attempted to take credit for something she was ready to criticize only seconds before.  The girl can turn on a dime, and I like that.

So I guess I’m on team Megan now.  I don’t like her, and I would never hire her.  Still, this show is completely contrived for the sake of drama, and Megan is bringing the drama.  Good for her.  At least she’s making Stylista somewhat bearable.

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November 13, 2008 at 3:11 pm

D’oh de Cologne

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STYLISTA

Cologne

On last night’s episode of Stylista, Cologne packed up her desk and took the elevator to obscurity.

All signs pointed to Kate going home, so it was a surprise when Anne Slowey, Joe Zee and Cynthia Rowley told Cologne that she wasn’t the right fit.  Although she could be a bit of a pushover, I don’t believe that she was the weakest player in last night’s challenge.  In fact, I imagine that the judges had an altogether different reason to send her home: Her mascara.  Wow!  The girl had clumps for days!

Ashlie, my hero last week, is starting to show some instability, and Megan is showing legendary prowess as a reality show villain.  I’m actually starting to think that the guy with the phony-sounding British accent might win this thing.  Maybe I’ll learn his name and start rooting for him.  Maybe . . .

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November 6, 2008 at 3:13 pm