Posts Tagged ‘Superhunks’
The Superhunk of Fashion Journalism
Andrew Sardone (via Facebook)
After fifteen rounds, zillions of votes and what seemed like an eternity, “NOW Magazine’s” Andrew Sardone has been voted by the readers of Auntie Fashion as the sexiest superhunk in fashion journalism.
In a close race between Sardone and the legendary Simon Doonan, the young stallion rounded the final stretch and bolted to the finish line to the delight of all those screaming fans who had put their money on this Grade A slab of horsemeat. What’s next for Sardone? I’m not sure. If we’re lucky, he’ll be put out to stud.
Thanks for your votes!
Battle of the Superhunks: The Final Round
Andrew Sardone (via Facebook)
Hogtown bon vivant and probable underwear model Andrew Sardone has clobbered the competition so far. What’s next for “NOW Magazine’s” resident superhunk? A centerfold in “Cosmopolitan” recreating Burt Reynolds’ famous bearskin rug spread — if we’re lucky!
Calling Barneys creative director and “New York Observer” columnist Simon Doonan a “sex machine” doesn’t really do him justice. Imagine if Optimus Prime and Megatron mated and had a mechanical baby, and that baby had an exceptionally impressive “unit.” Now that’s Simon Doonan!
NOTE: You have two weeks to vote for your favorite superhunk. This final round of voting will close on January 31, 2010.
Superhunks: Semi-Final Round Two Results
In what might be the least-surprising news since Heidi Montag admitted that she likes plastic surgery, Simon Doonan crushed Robert Verdi in the last semi-final of the Battle of the Fashion Journalism Superhunks. Like his signature Liberty print shirts, there’s something about this man that just makes you want to pull him closer and take a whiff.
Come back on Monday for the final round. It’s what you’ve all been waiting for!
Battle of the Superhunks: Semi-Final Round Two
Barney’s New York creative director and “New York Observer” columnist Simon Doonan recently courted controversy when he decorated the White House for Christmas. How exactly did he get a bunch of frigid conservative pundits all fired-up in the middle of winter? Probably by being too sexy. It might be chilly in the old USA this time of year, but one look at this superhunk can make anyone feel the burn south of the equator.
Stylist Robert Verdi is a study in contrasts. On camera he’s your typical Hollywood fashionista: Catty. flamboyant and fabulous. Off camera, however, it’s a different story. You’re more like to find him in coveralls, hunting gear or a Nascar jumpsuit. A source close to the superhunk put it best when she said “He’s like your best girlfriend, except that you can’t **** your best girlfriend.”
Superhunks: Semi-Final Round One Results
Andrew Sardone (via Facebook)
The ruggedly rugged and handsomely handsome Andrew Sardone of “NOW Magazine” has made mincemeat out of “Vogue’s” Hamish Bowles in the first semi-final of the Battle of the Fashion Journalism Superhunks. Backed-up by a Twitter campaign (likely started by a certain gushing, bespectacled female fan who shall remain nameless), Sardone has earned himself a place in the final of what might be the most prestigious award in international journalism. As the saying goes, “Pulitzer schmulitzer . . .”.
Anyway, come back tomorrow for the second semi-final. You won’t want to miss it!
Battle of the Superhunks: Semi-Final Round One
“Vogue’s” European editor-at-large Hamish Bowles has embarrassed his opponents so far, not even giving an inch to his puny rivals. But will he measure up now that the competition is getting stiff? Is he as well-endowed with fans as he is with — umm — talent?
Andrew Sardone (via Facebook)
Like the skirt-chasing Rock Hudson in “Lover Come Back,” “NOW Magazine’s” Andrew Sardone is the antithesis to my earnest Doris Day. And although we’re essentially rivals competing for the same market share, the tension between us can only lead to one place: A seedy roadside motel. I know who I’m voting for!
Superhunks: Quarter Finals Round Four Results
In what can only be compared to a WWE smackdown between two greased-up, spandex-clad muscle studs, Robert Verdi has emerged the victor in the last quarter final of the Battle of the Fashion Journalism Superhunks. It’s as if he fought off Joe Zee’s legendary Polish Hammer only to trap him in the corner and finish him off with a highly-suggestable yet crowd-pleasing Bronco Buster — if you know what I mean.
Come back tomorrow for the first semi-final!
Battle of the Superhunks: Quarter Finals Round Four
Working on the docks was a stylistic choice for fashion expert and part-time longshoreman Robert Verdi. A source close to Verdi claims that he was inspired by Brad Davis in Rainer Werner Fassbinder’s obscure 1982 film “Querelle.” But what inspired Verdi to pursue a career in fashion? The boobs, probably.
Joe Zee’s reputation as a ladies’ man hasn’t stopped him from rising up through the ranks of fashion journalism; his talent has taken him taken him straight to the top. Yet the rumors never seem to go away. Is he Robbie Myers’ boy-toy or would Anne Slowey have something to say about that? Easy girls — it looks as if there’s plenty of this superhunk to go around!
Superhunks: Quarter Finals Round Three Results
As expected, Simon Doonan creamed Jim Nelson in the quarter finals of The Battle of the Fashion Journalism Superhunks. Just look at him; how could anyone compete against that? It’s as if Zob herself has conspired with Mother Nature to cram as much sexiness as possible into a single specimen of manhood. I’m surprised he doesn’t implode like a black hole under the mass of his own dreaminess.
Come back tomorrow for the last quarter final.
Battle of the Superhunks: Quarter Finals Round Three
Like a greased-up Chippendale’s dancer, the “GQ” editor-in-chief stripped down to his thong in order to strut his stuff in the first round, and the chicks came out in droves to show their support. But will they continue to vote for Nelson in the quarter finals, or are they going to be shoving their money into someone else’s underpants?
Don’t let his diminutive stature fool you: There’s more — perhaps a lot more — to Simon Doonan than first meets the eye. “I’ve been trying to get him to do a movie for years” claims veteran adult film director Pussy Chan. “That’s a whole lotta man to fit into such a small package, and don’t even get me started about his package!”
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